Im calm now, I just feel his viewpoint undermines what I have been through in my life. I really don't discuss my life usually to the extent that any one person would know me well enough. However, I don't think it's right to really give ones opinion on this matter in such a way as everyone has different experiences.

I have learned while one thing may not bother me, it can seriously effect another in ways you can't know unless you are them. That means, if you belittle the events they been through, and mark it off as some how as necessary. Or you say it was ok for that to happen, will set someone off such as myself.

I will admit, for a long portion of my life, I hated everything and everyone. I was bullied to the point .. where I really wanted to just kill everything.

No ONE should ever be driven to that point. No one should EVER feel that way. I was driven nearly insane by my hatred of people because I felt everyone was out to get me. Everyone hated me. I thought this world is so messed up beyond repair.

Everyday it was a fight to survive.

Now also remember this, you have to factor in that persons life as well. Outside of school, a persons life maybe a living hell. That means any bullying on top of it, is just that much worse.

Last but not least not everyone has the strength to stand up to bullies.

TLDR: Your personal experiences on the matter will not help you realize how bad it can get for some people. Just because you where personally able to deal with it, doesn't mean everyone can. It's wrong to place your opinion on these matters due to your own personal experiences as if everyone experiences it in the same manner.

This is how your undermine peoples personal experiences and set someone off.

Edit:

"Bullying teaches many kids how to deal with difficult situations that they'll have to deal with as they get older. It teaches kids how to have thicker skins. It sucks but it's one of those hard truths of life; bullying hurts, but it also helps people grow. If people cannot realize that then perhaps this world will never really move forward. "

This is the biggest statement that I can't agree with. Because you are assuming everyone handles it in the same manner. Then you jsut right it off as it sucks but is the hard truth. Which seriously is messed up in my eyes.

That is like going up to a kid and saying TOUGH! Just deal with it!

Days go by and you find the kid hung himself in the basement .. Good job! That tough thing worked wonders.

I'm gonna try to not be as cynical as I wanna be in response to this post, so bear with me.

When you're 4 or 5 years old, maybe even 6 or 7, and you encounter your first bully, chances are you're gonna cry. Ya know why? Because you don't know how to deal with that situation. Or you're gonna start screaming back at them. As you grow older and deal with it, more and more, your immediate response isn't going to be to scream or cry, it's going to be something a little more rational, like going and telling an authority or flat out telling the kid to fuck off. You're not gonna have the same reaction you had when you were little. Ya know why? Because that experience changed you; it gave you 'thicker skin,' as it were.

I've never seen a case where that didn't happen. My youngest brother encountered his first bully in about first grade, because my youngest brother had a speech impediment. He came home bawling. A year or so later, he wound up getting in trouble for flipping that kid off after he was continuing to make the same remarks. Ya know what happened? The experience DID toughen him up. ALL experiences you have prepare you for similar experiences, and teach you how to better deal with them later on.

Hell, that's the LEARNING process! You have a type of problem, you learn to solve it, and from that point on you know how to solve that problem no matter how it's thrown at you. Sometimes your approach may be different, but the concept is still the same. It's the same thing with bullying. SHOULD bullying occur, no. But it does, and it probably will occur for the rest of time. It's a part of the human condition that we cannot and will not ever be able to stop, and thus, the only thing we can do (other than punish the bullies and hold them accountable for being assholes) is to better ourselves and learn to deal with it. Really that's all you can do. Unless you go out and kill someone for bullying you, that person probably won't stop what they're doing till they get older and mature. If they don't, well, the real world doesn't tolerate bullies, and they'll get shut down real fast.

I'm not writing bullying off at all, though, but yes, it's a hard truth that sucks and we all HAVE to deal with it. You will never escape bullying. Nobody in this society EVER will. So you MUST learn to deal with it, and if you don't, well... then you don't and you won't be able to function in the rest of stable society. That's really what will occur.

Liam, mate, that is where I have to disagree. Bullying doesn't always toughen people up. My firend with aspergers I was talking about, as well as myself, both almost killed ourselves. And even now, he has trouble dealing with it, me not as much but I still refuse to do anything due to my knowing I won't win

I never encountered hard core bullying I was only called names and ignored them they mean nothing to me because I never knew them and I turned the other way. One racist black dude I remember got up in my face and wanted to start something then someone did a smart ass comment and say don't make fun of him or he'll go on a shooting rampage. I gave them dirty looks and ignored them because I really didn't care.

I get what you mean, and your response is "If you can't fix it, let's handle it in the best way that we can".

I agree. The best way we can handle it is to try and prevent it as much as possible. If it happens, then it happens, but I think things should be done about it so it doesn't continue.

I went through 1st- 5th grade being bullied just about every school day ... 5 years

So let me ask you. . is there any reason why it had to last 5 years? Teachers knew it was going on. So what stops them from doing something about it?

When you tell a parent, sometimes they will respond with the same answer you give. Why?

I think people let this notion go to far. Something needs to be done right away instead of giving some stupid excuse to let it continue.

In other words, they use the same very notion you use, but they abuse it. They use that notion as some sort of excuse for not doing anything about the bully.

That is wrong no matter how you look at it.

The reason it lasted for 5 years was because you were in elementary school. Primary school is where people are extremely immature, and thus, they're going to do immature things. That's sort of just the way the world works, and by that notion it means that it was just very likely to happen for 5 years. When you're 5-10 years of age, what is a teacher gonna do to permanently stop someone from bullying you? It's like trying to talk a brick wall into turning into pudding. It will never happen, no matter what you do. There're punishments to try and prevent it from happening again, but overall those attempts usually fail. Not only that, you can't hold someone who hasn't fully developed mentally entirely accountable for acting in such a manner; if we were all held accountable for how we acted before our mental faculties were fully matured, we'd all be pretty screwed.

Yeah? Well explain high school, when kids are supposed tio be mature. HS and MS are actually filled with more bullies than elementry

Kids aren't mature during High School, their brains are NOT fully developed. The brain doesn't fully develop until the early to mid 20s. This is why you see less bullying in College; also because only at least semi-intelligent people actually go to college; and when I say college, I don't mean community college, I mean like, 4 year schools.

I don't have too much input, mostly because I've only dealt with generalized bullying. Someone sees that I'm vulnerable, self-conscious, or whatever, so they decide to "have fun" by just coming up with insults. In most cases, from what I've seen, it's either that or their trying to cover up their own insecurities. Though, my personal bullies just wanted to see who they bother and how.


My experience seems opposite what I've seen from others, I don't remember alot from grades K-4, but I don't recall anyone in particular bullying me aside from occasional instances, where they were just overall in a bad mood.
Middle school was better, had a group of friends, one enemy, and a few friends in high school. (starting in 5th grade, I went to Christian schools, so all grades in same building). Though, in the middle of 6th, my family moved. The rest of 6th was about the same, but 7 went downhill. My 7th grade in that school ended a couple months in and had my brother and I went to a different school. I won't explain yet, but will if people are actually interested in why.
Starting in 8th was when my bullying actually started, most random insults, a few worse. My brother did stick up for me on numerous occasions, and by my junior or senior year, I was acquainted with most of my bullies, and it slowly stopped.

So, I'm not sure I can contribute much to the topic at hand aside from, there are multiple ways of dealing with bullies, and experiences vary. My opinion is that there is no real answer that has 100% success, but your results may vary. I don't think every option works for every situation.

Excuse after excuse.

I am starting to fear that is all you can do. Give them excuses.
Adults bully too, you just see it less often because there are consequences involved. Unlike when you are a kid .. you actually get disciplined. Sent to jail. Fined.

Because everyone is too afraid to discipline a child. And they give them excuses ... much like you do. This is why bullying never seems to lessen. Heck .. even spankings are now controversial .. omg .. abuse!

It's so stupid >.>