Tiny Tina's Padded Badonkadonk (Private with Devilsnevercry)
 

A collection of loud noises and a cloud of smoke was coming out of a cave in Tundra Express accompanied by a cheery singsong voice that seemed much out of place in the borderlands of Pandora if one didn't know who was singing. "All around the sta-actus plant, the stalker chased the bandit. The stalker though 'twas all in fun.....POP!!! Goes the bandit!" came from a 13yr old girl known as Tiny Tina. A very unstable explosives expert who lived in the wastelands by herself. Which, giving that she was still alive, said something about the young girl.


What had currently caught the girls attention was a very large bomb in front of her on her workshop table, that was currently the cause of the smoke. Tina had scavenged it from the Hyperion train crash in the Terminus Plateau where the vault hunters put an end to Wilhelm. She had been searching the wreckage for weeks taking all the useful odds and ends she could gather. The bomb in front of her was the latest treasure from the wreck that she got from a reinforced storage car. Its control panel was smashed but after opening it up Tina was positive she would be able to fix it. "Dammm girl come onz, stop with the smoking. Youz gotsa hot date and Tina here needs to turn you into one fine badonkadonk!!" A few more sparks came from the circuitry before the girl thought she had finally fixed the problem. That was until some lights on the bomb lit up and a rapid beeping started.


"Uh...whoops....no no no girl, it's gonna be fine. dont cry! don't cry!" Was all the girl got off trying to shut the bomb down before one of the bombs fuel tanks ruptured and blasted the now unconscious girl back into the side of a dumpster, leaving a good sized dent as the girl ended up wetting herself. The explosion causing a thundering bang to echo across all of Tundra Express as thick black smoke was pouring out the entrance of Tina's workshop.

Maya current on a mission not too far off from Tina's base heard the huge blast. She shrugged used to explosions coming from the tiny phsychos home. That was until she saw the smoke. She ran to the burning rubble that was tina's home and saw the girl passed out on the ground.

She took a nasty hit and had crashed into a dumpster. Poor thing she crouched down noticing the girl had wet herself and sighing gently scooping the girl up. She reached into her storage and pulled out a coat she wrapped it around the girl to keep her warm before calling a car at one of the stations and buckling her into the right side. She grumbled pulling out another coat for the girl to use as a blanket.

She drove them all the way back to sanctuary being as calm on the ride as one could on Pandora killing a couple bullymongs on the way through. She got them there in one peice and carried the girl to the little residence she called home. It was on the nice side of houses cutesy of most people not arguing with a powerful siren. She set the girl down on the couch. She cundresedher and left her in one of her tee shirts which worked as a dress for the young girl. And gave her a warm blanket to sniggle up in. She took a seat and gently petted the girl's hair waiting for her to wake up.

The girl remained out of it for the entire car ride back to Sanctuary, only a few whimpers coming from her as she changed position causing some pain. The girl was out for a good few hours before she finally started to stir and wake up. "Guhhh...ughhh, Sir Reginald...i think we partied a bit too hard last night...." As the girl tried to move, causing shooting pain to go up her legs and her arms throbbed she whined out. "Ahhhhhhhhhh"

Maya gently handed the girl a bottle of water "drink up" she cooes gently giving the girl some aspirin to numb the pain. She allowed the girl to move at her own pace after that "sweetie are you okay?"

Tina took the bottle of water for the moment, ignoring the fact that Maya was suddenly there, and takes a few big gulps, coughing a little. "Ughhhh...Dam...I couldn't stopz the lady from crying. Miss Fluffybuns will be so disappointed her new girlfriend wont be ready for date night..." The girl rubbed her head, wincing slightly as she started to notice she was not in her workshop...or in her clothes. "Woh woh woh girl, what you doing messing with my rags Maya. How you do that to ya girl Tina?! I gotta get back to the lady's they gots a hot date tonight and I can't lets them go stag. NO WAY?!"

Maya grabbed the girl's shoulders and gently sat her down "Tina sweetie your house blew up the girl's aren't there anymore" she said delicately "you needed different clothes you had an accident after hitting your head." She elaborated.

Tina let herself be guided by Maya, but didn't plan on sitting still for long. Though she did take the news of her lab blowing up relatively well, tho chose to ignore the accident comment, more focused on her home. Surprisingly this happened to the girls workshop very frequently, who would have guessed. "Dammm my bad, still that explosion had to be AWESOMEEEEEE" The girl said in a singsong voice. "Though now that means I gots to clean out the rubble again. Thats gonna cost a lot of moolah moolah!!! Not to mention all the bandits ill needa kill trying to run off with the goodz" The girl said starting to think, standing up and pacing around a bit. "Though......if I could findz myself some strong suckka's with the skillz....." The girl turned back around to Maya with one of her insane smirks. "Hey....Vault hunter....Maya.....my siren...my girrrl..... Wanna make some scratch?"

Maya shook her head exasperated "Tina your workshop is nothing but rubble at this point....." She said trying to get the girl to grasp the sheer size of the former blast "but if you'd like you could stay here for a while?" She suggested somewhat unsure already. "Anyway I made food eat up" she said handing the girl a sandwich to eat while watching her closely.

"Nah girl, yas don't have ta worry, Tina got her stuff all locked up tight. Just gotta clear the rocks and its home sweet home....I'm sure the psychos got some badonkadonk's hiding somewhere.." Tina replied still seemingly unphased by the mention of her workshop being blown up. "If you dont wanna help, thas fine girl. I can just wait for Roland to get back, he'll be willing to help..." the girl continued, but to the vault hunters that were the girls unofficial family, the Roland comment showed just how much the girl was in denial right now. She was about to say more but the mention of food and then it being handed to her overroad her thought process as her stomach growled. "Well its not crumpets, crumpets are cruuuunk...but I guess it will do." She replied, taking the sandwich and happily eating it. It was always a guessing game with Tina and how she was really feeling, the vault hunters all knew the girl wasn't right in the head, who could be if they were on Pandora tho. Roland was the only one who seemed to really understand the girl and her interactions with the other vault hunters weren't the most sane. She had probably already scarred them with her tea party with Flesh Stick.

Maya was massaging her temples already.this was a phsychotic sociopathic Pyro maniac she shouldn't help her for her own sanity..... then maya looked again. She was also a little girl and one none of them were brave enough to deal with or console. They couldn't avoid it forever... well they could but..no she needed to do this.she needed to bring some closure on the roland front because this... this denial can't help. She gently took the girl and pulled her into her lap "Tina we need to talk about roland." She paused sighing deeply "I know you loved him very much but you... you need to understand he's not coming back" she whispered "he's gone sweetie" she whispers holding the girl tight. This was right this was the thing they should've done. They all ran from the problem they a) hid like cowards this needed to end. Someone had to care about this little girl and if it needed to be her too hell wit the consequence "Tina it's okay sweetie just try to let it all out."