Shuffle Piece! Part One, Chapter Two. (An AB/DL One Piece Fan Fiction.)

[Kid Chimour]

I was informed this wasn't worthy of being considered as spam... I really hope it isn't, since this may kill my account. Repeated offenses, being what they are. Still, I have the best of intentions going forward. I don't do this to piss anyone off. Only to share my story.

With that said, here we are with the second chapter:

CHAPTER TWO: THE ROOSTER, THE HARE,& A ROYAL REPTILE.

“So, you see? It’s kinda like this, Zoro,” Carrot said, the elder mink coating her sword in armament haki of pitch black. “However, this application is nothing compared to what the legendary ‘Mihawk’ is capable of.”


Zoro chuckled a little at the mink’s words, shaking his head. “Don’t be too hard on yourself. You showed me something exciting to try out, and that’s all I needed,” He said, soon practicing with his ‘Wado Ichimonji’.


“I’m happy I could be of assistance.” Carrot smiled, nodding her head as she left the swordsman to it. It helped that she was so much older than the others on the crew.


It meant she had better insight than everyone else, so they really made her feel useful. Like she was doing something worthwhile again. She’d missed that feeling, so this really meant a lot to her.


“Though, they’re still not letting the diapers go,” She mumbled, her ears twitching as Luffy started talking to Usopp about it. “Whatever. Hey, Nami! We almost at Logue Town, or?” She asked, approaching the navigator.


“Should be! Why don’t you go sight for it?” Nami offered, handing Carrot a spyglass.


“Will do!” Carrot chirped, taking the tool before hopping up into the crow’s nest. It was nice being able to do her old job, but from a less stationary platform.


Sure enough, she spotted the port town within seconds, calling down to Nami shortly thereafter.


“Ya know? She could theoretically help us aim these cannons with those eyes of hers,” Usopp said. “Maybe we should let off on the teasing?”


“Shishishishi! Usopp! She’s like ten years older than both of us, and she still wears diapers! How can I not pick fun at-” Luffy started, Carrot chucking a snowball at his head.


“These ears aren’t just for show, you know!” She called out, Luffy smirking as he got up. He just had a brilliant idea, and he was going to make sure their newest member went along with him on it.


“Oi! You can make it snow, so I wanna snow ball fight!” He hollered out, challenging her. “Bet ya can’t beat me!” He boasted, Carrot joining him within seconds.


“You really are incorrigible. You know that?” Carrot asked, laughing. “Alright? If you want a snow day that bad, then I guess I could,” She relented, allowing herself to indulge in some more lighthearted fun as it began to snow.


“Game on! I’ll take you any day of the week! Or month!” Luffy grinned, the two engaging in a snowball fight. Usopp taking a break from fishing to build himself an extremely intricate sculpture out of snow.


Nami tittered at the sight, shaking her head. “Children. Well, this should help along their relationship, if nothing else,” She reasoned, her captain pelting her in the face with a snowball, next. “Luffy! You son of a-” She started, getting hit by yet another.


“Come on, Luffy! It’s bad form to fire on innocent bystanders, you know?” Carrot offered, having already erected the perfect snow fort.


Luffy didn’t listen naturally, and started targeting everyone. Their one-on-one match quickly becoming a free-for-all. “I’ll take all of you! Come on and get me if you’re feeling lucky!” He laughed, ducking and dodging as his crew began returning fire on their idiot captain.

~***~

“How far do you take this, anyway?” Nami asked, patting Carrot’s rump. “Ah! So we’re going commando today, then?” She questioned, Carrot blushing at the quick check.


“Just know I would never use them. Not without a private room, and a willing caretaker, of course,” Carrot said, looking around the crowd for some sign of Smoker. “I may be a pervert, but I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable.”


“Sanji would do it, but you still need a private room,” Nami said, knowing he’d change the mink, if only for an excuse to check her out. “Actually, have you ever considered making money off this? As a model, or something?”


“I have, but we already did that in the last story. And it’s becoming a tired old troupe at this point,” Carrot said, playfully poking Nami between her breasts. “Think we should say I’m doing it, but off screen it so that it doesn’t get terribly annoying?”


“It means more money, so yeah. I’ll be your agent,” Nami said, deciding to ignore the copious number of cracks made in the fourth wall. “They’re becoming way too self-aware. Anyway! Speaking of money, Zoro went off to go buy more swords. To replace those last two ‘pieces of crap’ as he so eloquently put it.”


“I will pay for the swords, as well as the diapers from here on out. Can’t imagine it’s much fun owing you so much in interest,” Carrot mumbled, looking to the skies above. “A storm’s coming. And this one is heralding something truly great.” She smiled, the two continuing on with their shopping all the same.


“You will be covering the interest, too! My darling new cash-cow!” Nami giggled, her eyes promptly taking on the form of Beri as she eagerly looked forward to that first paycheck.


Zoro, his ears burning, could be found at Ipponmatsu’s shop with Tashigi‘the sword nerd’ in tow. Even if the swordsman knew that Carrot would be covering for him financially, he still would’ve had a hard time picking out two suitable katana.


Thankfully, Tashigi managed to make up for this by helping him identify the ‘Sandai Kitetsu’ he’d pulled from the discount sword barrel. The blade giving off a truly evil aura.


“I can’t sell that one, I’m afraid,” Ipponmatsu said, his face paling. “It’s cursed! Everyone who’s ever wielded one of the three Kitetsu blades has died a horrible, grizzly death! Selling you that sword would be the same as me running you through, myself!”


“Sounds like the perfect weapon for me. I think I’ll try my luck,” Zoro said, throwing the sword into the air and holding out his arm. So that, if he truly wasn’t good enough, the blade would slice his arm off before landing.


They looked on in horror, but fortunately for Zoro the blade just missed his arm. Planting itself into the wooden floor.


“I’ll take it,” Zoro said, smirking in his triumph over the curse.


Ipponmatsu was so impressed and moved by Zoro’s bravery and skill, that he went to go fetch his family heirloom. The ‘Yubashiri’. “Here! Take this sword, as well! It may bring you enough luck to balance out the curse of Kitetsu,” He reasoned, seeing great promise in Zoro as he went to finalize his purchase.


“Very nicely done, Zoro! You’re kinda nuts, though,” Carrot piped up, having entered the building just in time the see the stunt. That was when she saw Tashigi. Oh, fuck me! She just had to be here, didn’t she? She thought, visibly tensing up only for Tashigi to sigh and shake her head.


“I may need glasses, but I’m not blind. Your track record as an officer was nothing short of spotless, until you exposed the ‘Conomi Island Scandal’. I can put two and two together on this one,” Tashigi said, frowning since she felt just a bit insulted by Carrot’s immediate reaction.


The mink allowed herself to relax, taking her hands off Gekkō. “Yes, well you and Smoker have always been a bit different from the average marine. My former outpost wants nothing to do with me, so I’ve gone ‘freelance’,” Carrot explained, knowing better than to call it ‘piracy’.


Even though she didn’t really consider the Straw Hats ‘pirates’. At least, not in the traditional sense.


“Yeah. It’s a shame you had to be a mink. The people won’t trust you as much, and will therefore buy into this nonsense that much quicker,” Tashigi said. “You have my sympathy, but say? Are you with the ‘Pirate Hunter’ here?”


“Yeah. Zoro isn’t too good with directions, so I swung by to pick him up. So that he wouldn’t get lost,” Carrot explained, an annoyed Zoro saying nothing as he carried his new swords next to the Wado. “It was nice seeing you again, Tashigi. Just please keep believing in me, alright? The smears will get way worse from here on out. That’s a given.”


“I’ll try, but why do you still wear the symbol of ‘Justice’ on your back?” Tashigi asked, pointing out the coat. “You’re not allowed to wear one of those, unless you’re in active service.”


“Justice doesn’t end with my role as a marine. If I couldn’t find it there, I will look for it elsewhere. Such is my resolve,” Carrot mused, Tashigi rolling her eyes since she knew she should really reprimand the mink more.


“I’ll let you off with a warning this time. But I am fining you the next time I catch you wearing it out in public. Got that?”

~***~

Deciding she most likely didn’t have the money to afford such a fine, Carrot first lead Zoro to the ship. To change out her jacket. Once finished, it was back to searching for Luffy. Because she knew he was probably getting in trouble somewhere, with someone.


“Took a little long there, just to take a coat off,” Zoro said, poking Carrot’s rump before rolling his eyes. “Of course.”



“One! That was extremely rude. Two! These are still clean and I’d just sorta slipped them on. Don’t plan on using them. And three! I find that, wearing them, brings me good luck,” Carrot said, going on to chew Zoro out even more as the swordsmen started ignoring her.


That’s when he started wandering off. In the opposite direction. Carrot groaning as she promptly took him by the hand and lead him towards the execution platform where Gol D. Roger made his final declaration.


“Hey! What do you think you’re doing!? I’m not into this shit!” Zoro shouted, Carrot feeling a bit like a mortified parent.


“I really have no choice. We need to stick together, but you’re too stupid with directions to walk in a straight line,” Carrot said, her tone of voice relaying that she wasn’t taking his shit. And that he’d better stop causing a scene.


Grumbling to himself, Zoro reluctantly complied with her. Again, making Carrot feel like a mom. As ironic as that feeling was for her, given her interests.


That two year time-skip can’t come fast enough, she thought, sighing as she spotted Luffy playing with some clown-nosed pirate on the platform. “Hey! Luffy! Could you stop fooling around and get down here!?”


Luffy just laughed, shaking his head. “Sorry, Carrot! Kinda trapped!” He grinned. “I think I’m about to die!”


Carrot’s pupils dilated when she took in the full scene. The clown holding a sword above his head. Ready to lop off her captains. As fast as Carrot was, there was nothing she could do for him now. Watching on helplessly as something unthinkable happened.


It was a miracle! A bolt of lightning struck Buggy’s sword, electrocuting him and incinerating the platform. The heavy rains rapidly putting out the fires as Luffy calmly took to his feet.


Laughing harder still, he shook his head. “What do ya know everyone!? I’m still here!”


Carrot was speechless. Never before had she met such a lucky man. He was like some sort of prophecy child. One who was truly destined for greatness. And she wasn’t the only one thinking this, either.


Her ears twitching as she heard sobbing come from within the crowd of morbidly curious spectators. A green-haired punk bawling his eyes out into his sleeve.

~***~

Inexplicably, the punk from earlier assisted them in leaving the port town with the use of his barriers. Saying that, if possible, he would make the time to hop aboard their ship.


Carrot knew time was of the essence now that Smoker had caught wind of their presence, so she didn’t bother to argue the point. Fleeing with Nami, Zoro, Usopp, Sanji, and their dinner for that night.


The only one who stayed behind was Luffy. Insisting that it was his duty as their captain to buy them the time they needed. Carrot would’ve stopped him, but again. She simply didn’t have the time.


And she didn’t want to have to fight a former ally in Smoker or Tashigi. Her more sentimental side would’ve gotten in the way, and she couldn’t risk that.


“N-name’s Bartolomeo! And yours?” Bart asked, stuttering since he genuinely believed he was fighting alongside a deity.


“Luffy! And thanks for the help, ‘Farty Mayo’, but you can leave them to me! I got this, alright!? Meet the others on the ‘Going Merry’ and keep them safe, if you really want to join!” Luffy shouted, Bart reluctantly nodding his head as he eventually left the young man.


“Your first mistake was drawing so much attention to yourself,” Smoker said, taking a drag off both cigars before exhaling through his nose. “Your second was sending away the only two allies you had, that could have potentially saved you,” He continued, making sport out of Luffy.


Just as Carrot had warned him, Smoker’s ‘smoke smoke fruit’ made it impossible to mount an effective counter attack. The marine captain soon having him dead to rights. Pinned to the ground with the sea prism tip of his jutte.


“I just can’t believe it was actually true. Carrot was always so loyal to our cause, and now she’s working for you. Disgraceful,” He commented, Luffy unable to move an inch thanks to the tips effect on his body.


“You betrayed her first! She did nothing wrong, but you guys ruined her life! You stole her friends from her! Her nakama!” Luffy argued, Smoker sighing.


“As if I’d take the words of a pirate seriously. Either way, you’re fin-”


“Is your organization so perfect, that you’d honestly believe such a thing impossible?” A man in a hooded robe asked, firmly placing a hand on Smoker’s shoulder. “Also, let him go. Their voyage has just begun, so it would be a shame if it were to end so abruptly.”


“You! What the hell are you doing here?” Smoker questioned, the man squeezing his shoulder a bit harder. Prompting the ‘White Hunter’ to let go of his prey before his shoulder was shattered.


“The winds of fate can not be redirected once they start up. Can’t you see it? They’re turning in our favor. It will happen, regardless. I’m simply helping the process along,” The man cryptically replied, watching as Luffy went to rejoin his crew. “I’m surprised your subordinate didn’t try anything before I showed up.”


“She’s still in shock. Can’t say I blame her. Minks get a bad wrap, but they’re also known for their steadfast loyalty,” Smoker said, rubbing his temples. “Is this really the direction we’re heading in? Should I start questioning them?”


“Authority should always be questioned. I would ask you challenge me, as well. But, with my work done here? I see no reason to continue prattling on,” The mysterious figure concluded, walking away and out of sight.


“Who was that? And why are we letting them go?” Tashigi asked, meekly approaching her captain.


“That was the ‘most wanted man’ in the world. If I tried to do anything, he’d have destroyed me,” Smoker mumbled. “Whatever. Tashigi? I’m curious about something he said, so can you travel to the Conomi Islands for me?”

~***~

“So? Does anyone know where Carrot-chan and Nami-swan got off to?” Sanji asked, sighing in relief, since they’d managed to get out unharmed. “Good work, Bart. With your barriers we can easily prevent any further damage to our flagship. We’re all grateful to have you aboard.”


“Oh-ho! Don’t mention it! I’m just a little bummed I didn’t have the time to invite the rest of my gang,” Bart said. “And, as for them? I think they’re taking pictures, or something. For a modeling gig, or whatever.”


“Another of Nami’s money making schemes, no doubt. It will probably start to gain some steam the more infamous we become,” Zoro mused, smirking when he managed to turn all three of his swords black.


It was only for a brief moment, but he still managed it. “That makes seven of us now, so we should probably look into improving this ship. Like adding rooms, and stuff like that.”


“We’re working on it! Don’t worry, kay? We’ll have tens of millions of Beri here soon!” Nami beamed, poking her head out from around the door leading into the living quarters.


“You seem pretty confident. She really that good at this, Nami?” Sanji asked, Nami excitedly nodding her head. Her eyes becoming Beri signs again.


“Ya know? If you followers of Luffy-Sama really want to supe this ship up? Well, my grammy told me that ‘Water Seven’ is the place to be,” Bart interjected, sagely nodding his head. “It’ll take awhile to get there, though. We still gotta cross over and enter the Grandline, first. And I heard that ain’t easy.”


“I’m sorry? ‘Luffy-Sama’?” Carrot asked, poking her head out next. “Well, all things considered, he certainly has the devil’s luck. Oh! Actually, could you create barriers for him to practice his armament haki on? That’d really help!”


“You’re very knowledgeable for some East Blue navy-dog. How do you know so much?” Bart asked, the thug ignoring the fact that Carrot liked wearing diapers. It was his first time seeing a mink, so he just assumed it was a thing they did. “Either way, you sure as shit weren’t born in this peaceful sea.”


“Nah. I was born on the back of an elephant, in the ‘New World’. That being the second-half of the Grandline,” Carrot began. “I left when I was like eighteen? And, for the past ten years, I’ve been training to be an officer. I’ve been all over the world, though I wouldn’t mind returning home one day.”


“So you’re twenty eight? Twenty two, here,” Bart said, raising an eyebrow when Carrot snapped her fingers in frustration. “Uh? What’s the deal?”


“It’s nothing! I’m just getting tired of being the oldest member, is all,” Carrot said, returning back to her photoshoot.

~***~

Safe to say, the seven pirates had a rough go of things when first they entered the Grandline through ‘Reverse Mountain’. First stumbling across a ‘Mountain Whale’ that Luffy decided to pick a fight with for almost damaging their ship. Thankfully, cooler heads prevailed, and Carrot was able to talk Luffy out of stabbing the poor creature with the mainmast of their vessel.


Though, she still very nearly had a heart attack when she realized their ‘navigator’ didn’t bring a ‘Log Pose’ with her.


“Seriously, Nami! Have you not done any research on how these seas work!?” Carrot asked, her mouth still agape in horror as she frantically flailed her arms around. “We’re just fortunate those two schmucks happened to be in the area! If we hadn’t stolen one from them, then we’d be completely fucked!”


One of the two aforementioned ‘schmucks’ roughly cleared her throat. “I’m still here, you know?”


“And I’m still raring to kick your ass for trying to poach poor Laboon,” Carrot immediately replied. The mink taken aback when the blue-haired girl laughed at her response. “What’s so funny? You know I’m not kidding, right?” She asked, clearly confused.


“Oh, it’s just… well, nobody has ever spoken to me that way, before,” The young woman explained. “Maybe I should just tell you? Was going to test you first, but I think you seven are up for the task. Besides, my fellows at ‘Whiskey Peak’ don’t stand a chance. I can already tell.”


Carrot pouted a little at how secretive the girl was being. “I’m sorry for being so cranky, okay? I’m still just agitated, because we entered the Grandline completely blind and without any way to navigate it.”


“I don’t know why you’re so upset! It’s more fun when you do it on the fly!” Luffy laughed, Bart joining in.


“Yeah! You only get one chance at life, so you oughta play fast and loose with it!” Bart agreed.


Carrot slowly shook her head, rolling her wrist towards the girl. Indicating she could speak now.


“I’m the princess of the ‘Alabasta Kingdom’. My name is ‘Nefertari Vivi’,” Vivi began, “Right now, I’m sort of working undercover as a ‘Baroque Works’ agent. Code name, ‘Miss Wednesday’.”


“Uh-huuuuh,” Carrot said, slowly nodding her head. “I’m going to need some form of identification here, lady. How do I know you’re not yanking my chain?”


“Sadly, I can’t really prove it. I mean, my friends will vouch for me, but-”


“It’s alright, honey. Let me do it. They’ll listen to me,” Came another voice, a woman with black hair appearing on their ship. Carrot gasped at her sudden appearance, instantly recognizing her from her wanted posters. “Oh my! Do I have a fan? Am I popular?” She asked, smirking over at the mink.


“You’re a wanted lady, is what you are,” Carrot said, blinking as an otter and a vulture got to work drawing sketches of them. The otter even showed Carrot hers. “Oh, wow! Very nicely done! Good job!” She grinned.


“That’s… not something you should be happy about,” Vivi said, hanging her head in defeat as ‘Miss All Sunday’ started laughing uproariously at the scene. “They’re sketching you, so that they’ll know who to put a hit out on,” She explained, the ‘Unluckies’ taking flight. They were safe now. Or so they thought.


“Aaaah! Well, in that case?” Carrot offered, jumping on the airas she swiftly moved in for the kill. Immediately decapitating both critters in a flash before then closing the distance between herself and the one laughing at her.


“Begone, ‘Devils Child’!” She screamed, the now horrified member of administration just barely making it out of there with her head still attached to her shoulders.


“Jeez! Kinda slow on the uptake, but you’re not somebody I want to take lightly,” She said, waving at Carrot from the relative safety of her boat. “Ah well. I can just tell ‘Mr. Zero’ what you look like, based on memory. You can feel free to keep the sketches,” She added, speeding away shortly thereafter.


“So, what the hell was all that about?” Bart asked, glancing over at Carrot. “Who’s this ‘Devils Child’? Someone you marines have been gunning for, I bet!”


“Obviously,” Carrot grumbled, making her way towards the mainmast of the Going Merry before being joined by everyone else.


Once everyone had gathered around, she started to explain the history behind the woman named ‘Nico Robin’. So that they all knew what they were getting into.

~***~

“How were you just an ensign? With that much combat prowess, you could have been a rear admiral! If not a commodore, at least!” Vivi shouted, feeling the safest she had in a very long time. These pirates were already ridiculously strong, and they were growing stronger all of the time.


“Does it really matter, Vivi? Not like I’m still a marine, so?” Carrot offered, the group drinking at a bar in Whiskey Peak. Having naturally kicked the asses of mostly every ‘Baroque Works’ agent there, first.


“I gotta say! I’m really starting to love how this katana cuts!” Zoro said, marveling over his Sandai Kitetsu. “Still, though! Who’d have thought we’d be taking on a quest this ambitious, this soon?”


“Fuck, am I glad I got on that boat! I can not wait to kick me some warlord ass! Watch out ‘Crocodile’, because I’m coming for ya!” Bart cackled, already on his twentieth pint.


“Crocodile won’t be that easy, guys. Remember what I said about logia users? He’s also a logia,” Carrot said. “Long story short, he can turn into and control sand. And, in a desert kingdom? He’s got a massive field advantage.”


“It pays off having a navy official to help us organize all of this. The intel you’re providing us with is invaluable. Still, one has to wonder why you’re so interested in helping us,” Igaram, formerly known as ‘Mister Eight’ said.


“Do you know why they got rid of me? It’s because I made them look foolish, by exposing their inept leadership,” Carrot said, resting her cheek in the palm of her left hand. “Naturally, I want to keep doing that. To both punish them, and to also make them clean up their act. Doesn’t help that I’ve always hated the warlord system, and would love to see it abolished.”


“It may have also had something to do with your being a mink. Aren’t many of you serving in the marines, and it would explain why you never got promoted past the rank of ‘ensign’,” Miss Monday chimed in.


“I don’t play that game, myself. You may be right, but I refuse to let my race define me. I refuse to ask the question ‘It’s because I’m a mink, isn’t it?’,” Carrot said, having another drink. “Perhaps I’m just being optimistic. I’ve heard some pretty horrific rumors about what goes on in ‘Mary Geoise’, but I chose to not believe them. Lest they keep me awake at night.”


“Commendable, but unrealistic I’d argue. As a woman, most find me grossly unappealing because of my body type. Most men don’t like them muscular,” Miss Monday commented. “Anyway, what will you do first?”


“It pains me to say this, but Vivi? We really can’t rush off into battle without a good doctor aboard the ship,” Carrot murmured, glancing over at the princess. “Will you forgive a slight detour while we search for one? Zoro is really good at getting himself horribly injured, and my field medicine is atrocious.


“Sure? I don’t see why we couldn’t do that? It’s not like I don’t understand. We’re entering a nation on the precipice of war, after all. And I would like to save them all if I can,” Vivi said, Bartolomeo laughing at her reasoning.


“Idiot! That’s completely impossible! Even if I don’t try to kill them, there will always be some casualties!”


“He’s not wrong, you know? War is hell, so it can’t be helped,” Luffy said, watching as Vivi grit her teeth, stood up, and promptly left the bar. “I wasn’t trying to be a jerk, but okay?”


“It’s just how she is. She’s a gentle soul, and would never want anything bad to happen to anybody,” Igaram said, now pouring himself a drink. “Did you want any, ‘Mister Nine’?” He asked, turning his attention to the baseball-bat wielding man with the kingly aesthetic.


“Sure? Why not,” The man said, taking the offered drink before having a sip. “Anyway, you guys are pirates. What exactly did you seek to gain from this?”


“Think you can pay us one hundred million Beri for the job upon completion?” Nami asked, the cat burglar already having something in mind.


Igaram stumbled a bit at the price, grimacing as he eventually nodded his head. “That’ll be all, right? I can probably get King Cobra to agree to such a sum if you manage it. You’re not just beating up Crocodile. You’re saving a nation.”


“Ha! Who would’ve thought playing ‘hero’ could be so lucrative,” Bart said, Nami rolling her eyes at the quip.


“No. There was one last thing I wanted. Don’t worry. Should prove much cheaper,” She continued, Igaram listening in as she explained her second and hopefully final term.

~***~

This one was a pain in the ass! The system turned almost all of my text black, so that I couldn't see it! Well, no matter. I'll just need to rely upon you kind folks to comment, and review this second chapter.

Hopefully, you can catch words that I'd missed.

Also, to all Admins who may be watching... please don't ban me for this. I'm just trying to share my art.

And some of the hyperlinks turned blue.Think it may all be due to a glitch in the system, or something.