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Yes, descriptions of the mess itself can be kept to a minimum, though I do prefer acknowledgment of what it is. Especially when it is abnormal. Like when urine is dark, or hasn't been much, or when messes are soft or watery. To indicate being healthy, sick, dehydrated, or constipated.
In terms of babying, nothing but physical regression. I doubt you're wanting sex, but just in case I don't like gratuitous amounts of it. Punishments must fit crimes. I don't like carrying rp's. I don't mind adding to the story and playing support characters when need be, but I don't like being the only one contributing. Trust me several people are currently doing that to me. Post leagnth I prefer to be four to five sentences minimum. Anything after is fine. With wetting and messing I prefer semi-realistic. Can't wet if they haven't drank anything. Can't mess without eating something.